By Gary Putnam

Well, it’s over for another year! After a very noisy finale, the debacle known as the 2024 Lyon Park Chili Cookoff went off about as feared on Sunday, March 3. The usual raucous and rowdy occasion was probably worse this year. The noise level was so high, it flushed birds from the nearby trees.  Some of that fright came because of the chili pots that neighbors from Ashton Heights and Lyon Park brought to this year’s Cookoff. It was a mixed bag as usual. Some were noteworthy because of unexpected excellence. Some were distinct because they weren’t really that bad and some were…well, as one of the three judges said, “smelled like a damp thrift store!”

Ranking was done by popular vote, notes added are from a veteran team of three chili heads who sampled every single chili—some, more than once when disagreements arose. Tums and Gas-X were generously provided by Paul Showalter who, of course, had to resort to bribes and furnish Tums for anyone to even try his chili. 

Hauling off top honors this year was Sebastian John (Pot # 4) with a very traditional red called “Southern Red”. One of the more serious chilis of the event, it was a standout with multi-layered flavors.

Second place (Pot #17)  was Laureen Daly’s “Silly Chili” which was a dark, “visually interesting” Venison-Chorizo deep red with a pronounced punch of heat.

Third place (Pot # 16) was Mark & Tricia Montgomery’s “Highland Street Classic” traditional style meat and beans with a ketchup-and-taco flavor…in a good way!

(Pot # 18) “Baby Got Chili” by David Morgan was the highest placing veggie chili. Corn, veggies, deep interesting red and sweet. Very notable, according to the judges.

(Pot # 1) “Pork Shoulder” by Dave Schutz, smooth finish, good meat taste. 

(Pot # 2) “Hel Has Fury” by Helen White, very creative, complex, sweet & tangy butternut squash with black beans.

(Pot # 3) “Good ole Fashion Chili” by Ann Reimers, a classic meat,” gluten free, no beans, low fodmap” can’t ask for much more than that!

(Pot # 5) “Reapers Roast” by Murray Jacobson, beef and veggie with a finishing kick.

(Pot # 6) “Eliza’s Famous Cincinnati Chili” by Matt and Eliza Hall. A sweet and smoky version of a famous chili with floral overtones.

(Pot # 7) “Nanna’s Best” by Ethan and Bess Zelle, judges: a mildly seasoned all-day-eating chili.

(Pot # 8) “Better Than Canned” by Paul Showalter. Barely.

(Pot # 9) “The Day After Tomorrow” by Ethan and Bess Zelle. A spicy red with a lingering tingle of heat that danced on the tongue.

(Pot # 10) “Deathbed Chili” by Amanda Hawkins, a spicy red aromatic . Said by the maker to be the one chili you would ask for as your last meal. This recipe is a legend in the mind of it’s maker.

(Pot # 11) “A Mother’s Love” by Gary Putnam. This bowl of red was so subtle that only a mother could love it. It was so underwhelming that it got only one vote (tieing for dead last). That single vote did not come from the maker. He wisely chose someone else’s! How would you feel to know that the world loves EVERYBODY elses more than yours?

(Pot # 12) “Uncontrolled Wildfire” by Elliott and Marlene Mandel. Sweet notes of caramel and lots of beans with an attitude.

(Pot # 13) “Papa’s Campfire Chili” by Dorothy Atewologun. Bison, jalapeños, onions and beans. What more do you need? A very good pot.

(Pot # 14) “Mama And Papa’s Chili” by Tom and Elizabeth Sheehy. Straightforward traditional bowl of well-balanced red. Safe for families.

(Pot # 15) “Drunken Chicken Chili” by John and Kim Franklin. Really sophisticated hints of smoke and cinnamon spiced chicken. The judges noted that most bowls of chili benefit from the proximity of beer and bourbon.

(Pot # 18) “Baby Got Chili” by David Morgan. A veggie chili which placed really high in the popular vote. The judges reluctantly praised it in spite of it being a spin-off from last year’s vegetarian winner. Judges admitted that it looked good and tasted good. Unexpectedly corny, red and sweet.

(Pot # 19) “One Hot Grandma” by Elizabeth Wray. Perfectly done meat, very spicy and aromatic served in an early electric warmer that must be over a half century old. It was so old that Alva Edison had carved his initials in it.

The chili credentials have been awarded for 2024 and so its time to fade back into our double-wides for another year and work on those or hopefully better recipes for next year’s cookoff.